I have a very small backyard, which is good as far as mowing is concerned, but not good for growing tomatoes – especially after we moved the tall wooded fence to incorporate the small entirety of it. And definitely tree growth decreased sunlight. One early year Der Bingle planted “a whole lot of” tomato plants and I developed canker sores from eating so many – then production went downhill and then we gave up.
Dandelions started to flourish and slowly I built up a definite enmity toward the modern yellow peril; they were, I think, unaware of the one way feud until I turned to chemical warfare. Then it got serious, evolving into outright hostilities and alliances and double triple secret double agents. That’s where the Iowa gnomes came in; they sided with the dandelions. LZP was the Supreme Allied Commander of the Gnome Foreign Legion and . . . hey, I’ve told this story before & I’ll tell it again next spring, so never mind.
Okay, back to tomatoes. I can’t grow them; LZP can – and does so with vigor . . . and some secret compost recipe. He told Der Bingle they were chest high and I scoffed. Propaganda! I knew it, just plain old propaganda.
So here comes this picture:
Yes, so they are chest high; we argue LZP is short. I also asked the guys here at the PBC & R if they thought this little blue giant looked like someone with a master’s degree. I asked, see, because I was myself green with envy.
Der Bingle called about then and I told him about the photo and he checked his email and after a moment, declared LZP had evolved and was now a garden gnome. Or he said something to that effect. And I said, “Of course, I just didn’t recognize him without his pointy red hat.”
Since it is late, I am not going to venture into Photoshop to draw one.
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Joe & Sloane
Joe & Sam (the tall and lanky gnome)
