It’s starting . . .

I’m starting to fret about this colonoscopy thing. I’ll tell you the truth here – the procedure isn’t something to which I am looking forward, but it’s not the real worry. And I don’t think the real worry is the results of this, particular test. (Did you hear my knock on wood? Maple – an end table.)

In the back of my mind is the fact that I’ve never had one of those phone calls where the doctor would like to see you – Is this afternoon or tomorrow okay? How in heaven would I handle getting challenging news? Not well, I think. I can tell you one thing, I would immediately think, “Oh, no. I had so much planned.” Well, that would be an outright lie. I am not a driven person.

Actually, I am tempted to cancel this appointment and force myself to get out there and live my life with the famed GUSTO for one full year. It would be a new experience. Usually, if someone tells me the road is clear, I respond that’s good, but I guess I’ll put off my trip and just putter around. I’m the type that wants the gusto option, though.

I could delete this post. And I sat here thinking about it. I could delete this post and just tell myself to buck up.

Oh, I was thinking about it again and minutes you cannot read passed. Aha, I initially typed “cannot” with a third “n” and immediately started thinking about telling everyone I had invented a new spelling to indicate can and not are spelled as one word. You know: can ‘n not – together. So I think I’ll go ahead and push publish because I guess if I didn’t, I would have to invent a reason to tell about the cannnot thing.