I had not heard of this HBO presentation until my grandson came around an aisle at Family Video with in in his hand. I did not know it was a series; I thought it was a movie. I nodded knowingly when he looked at me as if I should be aware of it and talked about Jude Law. He didn’t mention Diane Keaton who is also in the show and is about my age and in her nun hat has noticeable wrinkles. That I found out later. It almost kept me from actually watching the show; I kept thinking, “Well, this just can’t be because if it is then I’m . . .(fill in your own old person cliche.)

I got over it and watched all the episodes; I became a binger. I’m not Catholic and so two things were occurring, one being the obvious – even for a non-Catholic – big, unexpected changes in Pope behavior, and the other, just marveling at the atmosphere inside the Vatican.

Now, I know the whole plot and I won’t spill any beans because others might be as new to the show as I was, and unlike me, don’t appreciate the “go to the end of the book” thing.

Actually, I’m not posting; I am pasting.

ALTERNATE POST TITLE:

ACCCCCCKKKKKKK.

.. WINTER WEATHER ADVISORY REMAINS IN EFFECT UNTIL 1 PM EST /NOON CST/ THIS AFTERNOON… * WHAT… MIXED PRECIPITATION OCCURRING. SLEET,FREEZING RAIN AND SNOW WILL TRANSITION TO ALL SNOW THIS MORNING. DIFFICULT TRAVEL CONDITIONS ARE EXPECTED, INCLUDING DURING THE MORNING COMMUTE. SNOW AND SLEET ACCUMULATIONS OF 1 TO 3 INCHES AND ICE ACCUMULATIONS UP TO ONE TENTH OF AN INCH ARE EXPECTED. * WHERE… PORTIONS OF NORTHERN INDIANA AND SOUTHWEST MICHIGAN. * WHEN… UNTIL 1 PM EST /NOON CST/ THIS AFTERNOON. * ADDITIONAL DETAILS… BE PREPARED FOR REDUCED VISIBILITIES AT TIMES. ICY AND SNOW COVERED ROADS WILL MAKE TRAVEL HAZARDOUS. PRECAUTIONARY/PREPAREDNESS ACTIONS… A WINTER WEATHER ADVISORY MEANS THAT PERIODS OF SNOW, SLEET OR FREEZING RAIN WILL CAUSE TRAVEL DIFFICULTIES. BE PREPARED FOR SLIPPERY ROADS AND LIMITED VISIBILITIES, AND USE CAUTION WHILE DRIVING.

Today the high is to be 57 degrees and tomorrow it will be 21?, maybe with snow. Yesterday, as it was warming, it was treacherous outside, with melting frozen slush ruts and perfectly flat black ice. So I went to bed planning on shoving the slush off the driveway and sidewalk after it had warmed a bit more. Well, it did that overnight. I woke this morning to see not one bit of snow or ice, and when I stuck my head outside, it felt downright balmy. It was sort of eerie.

BUT tomorrow, tomorrow is another story. At this time, freezing rain and hazardous conditions are forecast for morning commute time.

I am sorry I complained about freezing in the dry cold. I want it to be negative degrees again with no humidity and therefore no moisture. Let the little dust-like stinging frozen crystals sting my face and blow across the ground, not sticking, melting or getting in my car’s lock and freezing it shut.

Forget about calling me AmeliaJake; we’d better go with Goldilocks.

It is warmer, quite a bit so in comparison to the last few weeks, and as a result, the roads which were swept by a very dry snow are in a different condition:

… WINTER WEATHER ADVISORY REMAINS IN EFFECT UNTIL 11 AM EST THIS MORNING… * WHAT… SNOW, POSSIBLY MIXED WITH FREEZING DRIZZLE. THE SNOW AND ICE WILL RESULT IN DIFFICULT TRAVEL CONDITIONS THROUGH THE MORNING COMMUTE. ADDITIONAL WET SNOW ACCUMULATIONS OF UP TO ONE INCH AND LIGHT ICE ACCUMULATIONS ARE EXPECTED. * WHERE… PORTIONS OF NORTHERN INDIANA, SOUTHWEST MICHIGAN AND NORTHWEST OHIO. * WHEN… UNTIL 11 AM EST THIS MORNING. * ADDITIONAL DETAILS… BE PREPARED FOR REDUCED VISIBILITIES AT TIMES. PRECAUTIONARY/PREPAREDNESS ACTIONS… A WINTER WEATHER ADVISORY MEANS THAT PERIODS OF SNOW, SLEET OR FREEZING RAIN WILL CAUSE TRAVEL DIFFICULTIES. BE PREPARED FOR SLIPPERY ROADS AND LIMITED VISIBILITIES, AND USE CAUTION WHILE DRIVING.

Wet snow and freezing drizzle. Rats. Sometimes when this happens, the temperature takes a dive and all the bumpy, slushy, pothole-like snow formations freeze into what feels like granite. This is so annoying when it happens right where your driveway meets the street. I think maybe four years ago, or was it only three, I spent around 30 minutes in my driveway entrance, tires trapped in icy ruts.

Well, I guess we shall see what comes.

I bravely, for me, got up and went marching into the shower and got wet all over, washing my hair twice as I have been instructed to do since before I can remember. I climbed into my robe and hurriedly dressed and then started drying my hair AND THE CIRCUIT BREAKER BLEW. So, I went out through the cold garage to reset things and unplugged everything but my hairdryer and, apparently, the hair dryer thermostat was affected.

Given the roll I am on, I am not going to mention all the funeral/burial plans that have been showing up in my email . . . Ah, typing that might have been a mistake.

Well, we do not have a blizzard situation, but we have more snow than we had two days ago when I jested about being jinxed with snow. Is this what Christmas Elves do when the season is over – go around peeking in people’s minds and blogs for fears and/or worries and then venting the frustration of being overworked prior to Christmas by responding with a TAKE THAT, YOU NAUGHTY COMPLAINER?

When darkness came around five yesterday, you could see the snow whipping all around the streetlight; you could see it for hours. And this morning in two hours I need to have Cameron at the dentist for a root canal. So I have to go shower and actually dry my hair before going out, not to mention that the root canalee will be in no condition to push if we get stuck coming back. Oh, Heavens, what have I done? Have I jinxed myself again? Do elves go postal? Okay, now I’ve got two groups upset with me.

Perhaps the East Coast blizzard will just back up and sit right on my head.

I awoke at just about dawn to see glistening white branches out the window. They appeared to be some vision from a snow globe; well, not exactly. This arc of the globe is in reverse; we are staring at it from inside glass, not the other way around. It is -14 outside where those branches glistened; forget about the wind chill, which almost doubles the downward movement from zero.

Of course, we have a warning which basically states: YOU ARE GOING TO FREEZE.

Normally, over the years, I would be sighing and pulling on warm clothes. I might even be happy that it is not snowing or that snowdrifts are not hip high on the two vulnerable spots on my driveway. I would be delighted that there are no piles of snow on each side of my driveway entrance that tower above the car and make entering the drive something like a video game.

For some reason, I am irritated by the fact that autumn toyed with us and then laughed in our faces as it handed the baton to winter. And winter played along, greeting us with the surprise one would experience at walking out a door and falling multiple stories. Let me just say, when I finished falling, I did not make a snow angel.

I did get a new Trane furnace this autumn, beating the frantic rush expected when the temperature started to drop. So I guess I am fortunate; I’m just going to have to work on my attitude.

And, please, powers that be, don’t take this as an invitation to jinx me with all that snow I mentioned above.

My grandson introduced me to Bizarre Foods with Andrew Zimmern on the Travel Channel and I have found my horizons expanding. Since I am descended from Midwestern cooks – although I don’t cook myself – my taste buds have not been challenged. Nor, it seems, has my eyesight. Watching the preparation of moosehead stew and the carving of a goose with the breast RED, not to mention the chunks of bear nostrils with bristles of hair still attached fried and served looking vaguely like croutons, is not like watching Grandma make a lattice crust for a pie. I cringe when I pull the sack of extra pieces out of the neck and belly region of a turkey, if you want to know the truth.

Andrew Zimmern puts food in his mouth and generally declares it delicious, adding sometimes comments such as: The stink gives it that special zing. I can’t quote exactly because I believe my memory is affected when my mouth is hanging open in astonishment at what I have heard. Today, Zimmern was in Sweden and sampled aged fermented herring that is akin to something rotten – really rotten. As the years of storage of the cans increases, the taste becomes stronger. Sometimes the cans swell up. The lady who prepares this culinary delicacy cautioned Zimmern that the smell can get into the furniture and so a lot of people prefer to eat it outdoors.

In his description of the flavor, Zimmern used the word putrid in several sentences . . . and he kept putting it in his mouth. While typing this, I have had to fight the urge to transform his name to Zimmerman because it is more common. Looking at the words together, I see that the letters deleted are M and A. That spells Ma and it makes me think of all the stories of soldiers on the battlefield crying out for their mothers. Perhaps Andrew has had so many battle of the dining table moments, that the “ma” just floated away in the ether of the psychic call for his earliest comfort.

They are now eating reindeer testicles and I just have to stop typing.

I clicked on a link to decorative items and took a close look at TWO wine glasses .

The description of the glasses designed by Steven Weinberg reads:

Make your dining experience a memorable one with this set of two modern and sophisticated white wine glasses. Their stems are filled with clear crystals for a sparkling effect and the base is made of a large faceted clear crystal. Not a toy. Not suitable for children under 15.

I thought paying $1.99 for an acrylic stemmed glass at WalMart was excessive and so I didn’t. Two would have been almost four dollars. Oh, the 2 for $399 ones are really lovely, but I’m clumsier than a 15 year old.