Ready to moo

My cow bag and my tipping cow T-shirt have arrived. Perhaps I should have used the word “tote” instead of “bag”.  Or I could have gone back and changed it, but ever now  and then, I forget the new technology in my hands and flash back to the days of typewriters and no delete key. Anyway, I think if I were to wear the shirt and tote the tote, I would give most people the idea of an overweight Maxine-type.

Oh my gosh, earlier today Der Bingle was waiting out a rain drenching in the front part of Rural King and he called to tell me how glad he was not to be in a car with soaked dogs.  He, Summer and Cameron took the dogs to the fairgrounds just a wee bit ago and guess what? Get ready. The sky opened up and is smacking the earth with water. I don’t think I can truly call it rain – it looks like a waterfall out there.

If they get drenched, they will have to change clothes because all but me are going to Auburn to watch movies. Colin, Summer, the dad and the mom are going to Marmaduke; Der Bingle is accompanying Cameron to a horror flick. I’m kind of under the weather – that is, is the bathroom – and I guess Summer only agreed to go if Der Bingle would sit through the Splice film with Cameron.

Trash fire

I have learned that trash pile fires can just keep on going, after they have produced enough smoke to make a car from the sheriff’s department cruise by slowly. Yesterday I mowed (again) at Mother’s and decided to set the trash on fire. Well, I did . . . and I wound up staying overnight to make certain it was completely out. It wasn’t bad – I fell asleep quickly after tossing a not-so-good book aside and didn’t wake until it was light out. Mind you, the book was not finished; I am one of those people who can stop at any point; I do not  feel compelled by some unwritten law to read to the last page before I am freed from a story that is causing me discomfort.

I also will look to the end of a mystery story so I do not read so fast to get to the ending that I don’t appreciate the writing.  For that, quite a few people consider me a pariah. I don’t understand it; it seems logical to me.

Rip

You might remember when I was in Fairborn a few months ago I ate in a restaurant and had urges to rip off the head of a bald man. Well, I feel like ripping a head off again, but I have no one in particular in mind. I feel so irritable I could steal Sitting Bull’s chair – not that he sat in a chair. He probably sat Indian fashion with crossed-legs. So I’d grab his blanket.

But what would I do with a ripped off head? I don’t think I have considered this before. I guess I am assuming I would rip off the head and drop it and leave the area . . . and at this point I am thinking it would just get too complicated. I believe it is that explosive moment in your mind when you KNOW you would absolutely love to rip someone’s head’s off that works best for relieving stress. There’s no pretending you are some sort of understanding, compassionate, empathetic person; you are a head-ripper. You accept it; you embrace it. You are free.

I wonder if there are people who can psychically sense the presence of a “head-ripper” and are inclined to put heads back on. Why I don’t know, but that’s why I don’t have the reputation of a nice person. Well, there is the mess issue again – heads, torsos, blood. Then again there is no mess when you are talking about this going on in imagination. You can actually smile while thinking, “I want to rip your head off.”

I seem to feel better now.