Just Me - AmeliaJake, The Peanut Butter Cafe & Roadhouse

The impromptu party

June 28, 2014 AmeliaJake

Last night, after Der Bingle arrived – and Shane had his fairground trip, Summer decided it was time for a party. Tongue in cheek, she talked of quality bonding time with her grandparents, by which she meant watching a movie while she interjected “remarks”.

Choosing a movie when the watchers are AmeliaJake, Der Bingle and Summer is the first obstacle to a fun-filled evening. We started off with a prolonged checking of what was on TV; that led to the viewing of the ending of at least two movies, one of which was Thelma & Louise and a somewhat prolonged period of her calling out the titles of DVD’s. We couldn’t agree on one, so we watched Tommy Lee Jones in, brace yourself, Volcano.

That would not have been my choice had I been alone, but agreeing to it ended the Chinese torture of titles of movies bouncing off my head with the rhythm of dripping water. She had not seen it before and we didn’t realize she did not know it was L.A. from the get-go. L.A., which she pointed out, does not have a volcano.

I announced I needed Taco Therapy and Der Bingle said he wouldn’t mind having a bean burrito, so eventually there I sat on the sofa, munching tacos, watching Tommy Lee Jones and fielding questions about the movie we were currently watching . . . and comments about the last part of Thelma & Louise and the off the cliff into the Grand Canyon scene. Summer felt that by ending the shot in mid-air, T & L might have survived and concluded it left too much to your imagination. Okay. Any remarks about iconic movie moments fell smack on the floor of a virtual Grand Canyon. Gravity and imagination – I guess it has a personal variable.

So, I sit this morning, sated with tacos and a little sleepy, When Quentin and Robert William were little, we made a point of introducing them to classic movies. Cameron, too, has become a fan of them, but this one . . . can I bear a long monologue about Ilsa getting on the plane or not getting on the plane?

***Jody Lynn Vance: 1985-2011***

Jody was born at sunrise on a bright, sunny, cold, snowy Groundhog’s Day and from Day One she was a gift to everyone around her. Her infectious laugh and rambunctious spirit made her the center of attention where ever she happened to be.

She and her Dad would watch Sesame Street and sing at the top of our voices (and quite out of key) all of the songs. She enjoyed having Mom fix her hair so it was fancy and just right.

As a toddler she had quite an impressive vocabulary and often had a lot to say. One time Dad was headed out the door to go to work and she pointed her finger and said, “No. No. No. Don’t go anywhere!“

Jody was very seldom crabby, always happy and she wasted no time in spreading that joy to everyone around her. Jody’s favorite place was to be perched on the lap of Mom or Dad or playing with her toys spread out all over the floor. Jody was always affectionate, wanting hugs and “moochies” as she called smooches on the cheek.

At around two, Jody’s illness began to attack her. It took a beautiful, innocent child and put her through untold pain and suffering,

I know that through all of that she was not afraid. She had the heart and spirit of lion. She never gave up; time after countless time, she would open her eyes and there would come that smile. Jody lost her speech, but never was at a loss for words. She could say more with a look or a half smile than most people do yakking all day long.

After numerous doctor, hospital, and specialist visits, we were given the news of her illness. I remember that moment frozen in time … it was as if the entire world stopped. It was in that brief moment we both knew that we must make the very most of the time we had remaining together and not dwell on the despair of all of the things that would never be.

Jody was not expected to live more than three or so - but she had too many things to do and stories to tell, so she cruised by that birthday and over two more decades of birthdays, Christmases and millions of smiles and hugs. Jody was well-liked by other kids; once when she was being wheeled into her classroom at Handicare, one of the children yelled, “Hey everybody, Jody’s here” and all the kids cheered.

Two of the biggest joys in her life were her two little brothers, Joey and Sammy. She would just beam with joy when they would sit next to her and when they began to get older she’d love to listen to them running through the house and playing together. The two of them would start laughing and Jody would laugh right along with them. She would listen intently to everything they did and they would include her as often as they could. The three of them loved watching Saturday morning cartoons and The Three Stooges.

Joe and Sam did without a lot of things that other kids had, did and took for granted … and they never once complained or were resentful of the way things were. That shows a special kind of love and a special kind of family.

As the years went by and the boys grew up into strong and healthy, Jody’s health slowly and steadily declined. She would have long stretches where she was fairly stable and then would become so very ill.

Many times we were sure the end was near and then she would open those sparkling blue eyes and stretch just like nothing had happened at all.

Once she was in the hospital with her usual bout of pneumonia and lapsed into a coma; this went on for 8 days. One Dr. came in, examined her and just shook his head. Later that night Jody’s eyes popped open and she was refreshed from her cat- nap.

People over the years have commented, ”I don’t know how you do it. ”This always struck me as odd. My thoughts would always be: How could you even think of turning your back on someone who needs you that much?

It was always our promise to Jody that she would always live at home with her family and I think she found comfort in knowing that.

But, no one person can take the credit for caring for this wonderful young woman. It has taken an army of doctors, nurses, teachers, aides, pharmacists, friends, and family over the years to maintain Jody at home, and we could never begin to thank you enough.

Jody always kept her head held high and never seemed to be afraid; she has truly been my inspiration on many occasions. When things were gloomy and seemed hopeless, just one smile and a hug was all I needed to go on. Jody will always be my hero. I love her and will treasure the time we had together.

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