The Leaning Cow

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The Dwarves of Grief and Thomas Bickle’s Light

March 2nd, 2015 ·3 Comments

So, what am I writing about? Well, something that I just realized I was reading about seven years ago: a little boy named Thomas Bickle who died of a brain tumor. I followed his story through his mother’s posting on her blog. Just type “Bickle” into the search category, and the posts will come up, if you are interested. Or just take a look at one – this one. Or type in Dwarves of Grief; it will melt your heart.

I have had a light – and amber one – in my west-facing porch window for a long time now; I’ve gone through several bulbs; It’s Thomas Bickle’s light. It sits unobtrusively on the wide window sill and shines out all the time. It is still there because some things just have to be remembered and acknowledged – an enduring remembrance that transcends the drama of an event that moves forever further into the past.

Tonight I noticed the special warmth of its glow and I almost heard myself whisper, “Hello, there, Thomas’ light. Shine on.”

I decided to write about these moments because every now and then, I need to stop with boring accounts and puns and made-up silly ideas and expressions of disgust at some politicians and just cite a worthy reason for this blog to be here.

Tags: Just Me - AmeliaJake · The Peanut Butter Cafe & Roadhouse

3 responses so far ↓

  • 1 Sarah // Jul 30, 2015 at 9:58 pm

    Thank you. I was just in a church in Santa Fe, remembering all the lights lit for him.
    So bright.
    -Sarah, Thomas’s mom

  • 2 Scott, Thomas's dad // Sep 1, 2015 at 2:02 pm

    I was looking for some information that might have been on Sarah’s old blog and ran across your post. Thank you for remembering. It means a lot.

  • 3 AmeliaJake // Jan 3, 2016 at 11:00 am

    I don’t know – when I read your comment I wanted to say something of comfort to you, but what? Just what in heck, what? And so I typed nothing, but it haunts me. I need for you to know I think of you and Thomas and if there were anything I could do besides remember, I would.

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