I have one of those alpine trees. You know the kind – skinny with scraggly little branches. This one is about four feet high and you can put them around the house in different places at different seasons. About a year ago, I put one of my plant stakes in the branches; this one was a stick with a coil at the top so the cow head would bob around. Yes, cow head. I’ll provide a picture later.

I thought I should decorate this tree with white lights and crystal bells, but the Alien Tree, which is most probably controlling my brain, led me to use LED colored lights and hang some golden and silver ball-shaped bells.

I suppose I am not done; more instructions are probably in the pipeline. So far the cow is looking somewhat perplexed. She may tip the tree.