Yes, I have noticed that when I look at myself upstairs in the master bath with the sunlight over my head, that I don’t look too bad. Sometimes, I will not look in another mirror for a long time and then I will catch a glimpse of myself in a mirror somewhere else and I am surprised at the dumpy plain person I see. It occurs to me that I cannot conduct my life from that bathroom but the magic is in THERE, not in the other places I go. I ponder having a picture taken of me in that mirror and pasting it on my face. I guess I could start out with first pasting it on a bag and then putting the bag over my head.  I don’t think anyone would take me for a bank robber since I am not a president nor a movie star. But they might take me to the funny farm, which isn’t politically correct to say and yet it falls naturally from my tongue.

Now, “asylum”  – that would probably be real bad to say. Unfortunately, I say it sometimes: “Well, I’ll just pack my bags and go to the asylum.” No, I don’t say that. I say, “You pack your bags and go to the asylum.” Of course, I use asylum so much that no one thinks too much about it being insensitive. Odd though, it’s okay to say you’re seeking political asylum . . . Oh, never mind, I see my mind is all over the place.

A couple of years ago I discovered LemiShine, which is really fortunate because we have 1) very hard water and 2) people living here who open the dishwasher mid-cycle and don’t re-close it. I remembered that we used to run Tang down garbage disposals and in dishwashers and found that now there was a commercial product for that purpose – I think of it as white Tang.

Anyway, a few months ago it disappeared from Wal-Mart shelves and in its place was something else that didn’t work. I went running to the Internet and found other places that sold LemiShine . . . and then a couple of weeks later, it was back on the shelves and I knew there must have been an uprising.

But it scared me and I stay stocked up.

Then, a couple of days ago, I went to the Pioneer Woman’s site that refers to house and garden, wondering if she had a lodge update. I found she did not, but she was touting the wonders of LemiShine. Noooooo! I feared there would be a run on it, that I would be forced to use generic Tang until production caught up with demand.

And I was busy; I couldn’t go right away to replenish. So, today, finally, I went over and first discovered that they didn’t have any more red rubber mulch (made from old tires) – the cads. The LemiShine Shortage fear throbbed stronger in my mind and I went over to the aisle where is is displayed. At first I didn’t see it. But then, there is was – one row  . . . and I took three.

I am worried that this won’t be enough; I feel like General Buck Turgeson in Dr. Strangelove; I  feel myself becoming agitated over a LemiShine Gap.

Dear LemiShine people,

Please don’t forget me and others here in Northern Indiana. Please keep us supplied. See, look: I will link to you many times. LemiShine, LemiShine, LemiShine, LemiShine.

Sincerely,

Your friend, AmeliaJake

Down into the lost world of transcription I go; I hate this task, but it is so helpful; you hear again the actual spoken words and their intonation and that reminds you of the multi-dimensional quality of what they are expressing. But, gosh, it is just a time-consuming task. It is not listening to the recordings that is bad – except when I hear my stumbling voice – but the typing, this pain in the neck typing. Yuck. Okay, I’m going.

UPDATE: done, done . . . Doing a little happy dance. Woo Hoo

They seek him here, They seek him there,
Those Frenchies seek him everywhere.
Is he in heaven?
—Is he in hell?
That dammed, elusive Pimpernel.

The original Pimpernel – hero. And, now, below, is this the dashing Red Merle Pimpernel?

I opened my computer this morning to check the news and was reminded that today is the Pennsylvania primary. YES! That meant it was Tuesday and Tuesdays are when Redbox gets new movies. I hopped over to the site and rented Charlie Wilson’s War, which Roger Ebert writes is funny. One dollar, one night. And online rental. Oh, Redbox, I am so fond of you – you sweet, sweet cutie of a vending machine.